Summertime Memory Lane - And it came to PASS

On my mind today:
I haven't seen my sister in a year.
I haven't seen my big brother in 6 months.
I haven't seen my little brother in almost a month.

This feeling overwhelms me every summer because summers used to be ALL about them. I'm not good remembering how things looked or what color the walls were and such. I make my memories with feelings. It's still something I do today. I cannot tell you what Sister So and So wore to church but I remember the feeling of the conversation I had with her. Even if I can't remember what it was about. When things feel heavy, I feel it. When things feel light I feel it. Please don't be upset when I don't notice your make-up or haircut or new car. I'm working on it, really. But if you need someone to just sit with you and feel what you might be feeling I'll be there.

I've been thinking about some of my happy feelings from childhood. There are too many to write about in one post but I wanted to jot this one down.

I 'grew up' in a small town called Dayton, Idaho out in the middle of farmland. Just over the river and a few miles down the hill from the now infamous Napolean Dynamite town, Preston, ID.
Growing up means I spent from age 5 to age 11 there. The previous years were spent in Boise and Pocatello and ages 11 -18 were spent in Nampa. So I guess "growing up" is not the correct phrase. It should read 'I spent my unbelievably wonderful childhood in a small town called Dayton, Idaho'. Yes. That's better.

I've tried to re-create my childhood summers for my children. Even going as far as moving out of a subdivision when they were 1 & 3 and landing in McCall and eventually buying a home in the middle of a giant meadow a couple miles long and surrounded by forest. Okay- it's not the country and they're not at the neighbors a half mile down the road feeding baby calves and getting in trouble in the hay barn, but they DO have free roam. We'll talk about the memories they are making another day but right now I want to focus on some summer memories with my brothers and sister.

One of my favorite memories of summertime with my brothers and sister happened in my room when I had the flu. I know, weird, huh... I had the flu and it was a hot, hot day. It was probably like 85 degrees hahaha!... (which is about the temperature at which my kids feel like they're going to die) and that night a GREAT BIG STORM moved in.

There is no place more beautiful than Cache Valley, UT to watch a lightning storm. My sister and I shared a giant room. We shared a room for 18 years until I moved out. When she comes to visit I still feel like we should kick all the other people out of our lives and share a room for the night.

Our room in Dayton had 2 HUGE windows. When the storm rolled into the Valley at about 10 that night my entire family came to my room to watch the storm. They didn't care that I had the flu. I didn't care that they were all sitting on my bed. It was beautiful. Surrounded by my family in the middle of a storm. With the flashes of light and the BOOOOOOMS! of thunder. Safe and happy in my bed.

"Surrounded by my family in the middle of a storm." is yet another way to say how I feel about them to this day. Storms are raging in all of our lives right now. Spiritual storms. Temporal storms. Big ones. Little ones. In my case, a few life threatening ones. (I'm ALMOST ready to write about that). But even in the middle of my storms when I feel like I can't hear my own thoughts because of the thunderous booms- my family comes to me.

How I wish we were all little again and could jump into my twin sized bed in my giant bedroom and stare out the window on our knees and just watch. And not worry about how long the storm would last and if we were gonna make it out alive... I never had fearful thoughts as a child. I would always be okay. I was always safe. I had my family with me. I was 9 and the world was good.

And now even when they are 2000 miles away (Heather in N. Dakota) or 1000 miles away (Bill in Wyoming) or even just down in the Valley (Mom, Dad, and Jeff in Nampa), I know they are there with me through my storms. Somebody once told me... "In the scriptures it doesn't say 'And it came to STAY'. It always says 'And it came to PASS'." Our storms will pass. They will. And just like 26 years ago in my childhood bedroom - my family will be there. And we are waiting and watching and ON OUR KNEES together (even though we're far apart) waiting for the storms to pass. I will always be okay. I will always be safe. I have my family with me. I am 35 and the world is good.